This morning Jax wanted to see the birds. We walked across the street and there was this eagle flying over us. Jax was so intrigued. Of course when it flew away Jax went into a full on tantrum because he couldn’t “fly” with it. Screaming and crying. Quite embarrassing…so I lost my patience and said, “You’re NOT a bird and can’t fly”. “Lets go!” It didn’t help anything, made things worse actually and then the joggers were looking at me…. So we left.
Well, while running our errands, we “had” to stop by the toys and guess what was sitting right on the shelf near his beloved dinosaurs? An eagle! It was the only one. It was sitting there perfectly waiting for us….His little eyes lit up and he screamed “biiiiiird”. I have a feeling God didn’t plant this eagle their for Jax. He did it for me. To remind me to be VERY careful of my words. It’s not about what I said. Its how I said it. My tone. My irritation. My impatience. Intolerance of my 2.5yo. Being a mom of “that kid” is hard but today I needed this reminder that it doesn’t have to be. He is just “a kid”. Not some bad definition of a kid.
I have to challenge myself to remember he has emotions that I can’t and won’t fully understand. That his defiance isn’t to drive me insane or to give me a hard time, he really is just trying to navigate his own…. thoughts, feelings, and reality vs. dreams. His communication is getting better but even as he searches for the words, it never comes fast enough… Its frustrating to be 2.5.and not understand why he can’t fly with the eagles or swim in the ocean, when people on T.V can. To not know how to ask me why he can’t fly or why I can’t fly with him . (In his mind, mom can do everything) So today I got a new perspective. I have to, in every effort, be available in his frustrations and not ignore them. All in all, I bought him the bird. He has been flying ever since.